More poor duet etiquette...

Not long ago, I posted some open duets on SingSnap.com.  I got a few takers, including one guy from  the States who sang "Unforgettable" with me.  I don't often do that song, actually.  I'm kind of thinking maybe I shouldn't have done it, now.

Yesterday, I got home after spending the long weekend in a lovely medieval German town.  I don't usually check SingSnap on the weekends, even if I'm at home.  I don't look at it at all when I'm out of town, mainly because I go on that site to make recordings.  I'm not really there to make friends or listen to other people... and while it's nice when people listen to me, I don't necessarily expect them to.  I sing there as a form of mental health therapy.

I do occasionally like to do duets, though.  Sometimes I run into some good singers and it's fun to collaborate with them.  On the other hand, sometimes I also run into people who are tone deaf in more ways than one.

Last night, I got a message from the guy who did "Unforgettable" with me.  He was wanting to know if I'd like to sing "Vaya Con Dios" with him.  I saw the message, but didn't immediately respond because I was busy with other things.  And basically, he'd invited me to check it out, which I figured I was at my leisure to do.  Imagine my surprise when I got another message tonight...

I have to admit, this message kind of made my heart sink...

First off, I don't like it when people want to assign me songs.  It's happened on more than one occasion.  I like to choose the songs I sing, and the duets I do.  It's one thing if I 'm participating in an activity that I signed up for.  It's another when some random person I don't really know wants to assign me a song.  In my mind, the original message was an invitation to see if I wanted to do a duet.  I figured it was my choice whether or not to take him up on the invitation, especially since we don't know each other at all.

Secondly, I only just saw the first message last night.  I've been out of town.  I get that this dude doesn't know my schedule... but maybe that's the whole point?  He doesn't know me, and apparently didn't take the time to read my profile, where I explicitly state that I don't check the site on weekends.   That's my time with Bill.

I also don't get notifications for anything other than comments on recordings because every notification generates an email and they can become excessive.  If I wanted to, I could set up my account to be notified by email for everything-- when someone likes my recording, when someone likes a comment I left, when someone makes a comment, for private messages, for responses to comments on the messageboard, etc.  It can add up to a lot of distracting emails.  It got to be too much, so I drastically cut back on what I wanted to see.  It's worked out to be a lot nicer that way.

Consider that when I make duets, a lot of times I do more than one.  Sometimes I get several takers, all of whom expect me to listen to the whole song, which I admit I rarely do, and leave nothing but gushing feedback.  That can add up to a lot of listening, sometimes to singers who are physically painful to hear.  The guy who wrote to me this time wasn't, as I recollect, a bad singer.  He wasn't that great, either.  I can tell by the comment I left him, although I'm not inclined to listen to a bunch of his stuff now that he's demanded to know why I haven't responded in a timely enough manner.

I'm sure many people would say my attitude about this is shitty and I should be grateful that anyone wants to listen to me, let alone sing with me.  Um... but while I do enjoy nice comments as much as anyone does, I sing more for myself than I do for anyone else.  Duets are fun, but I'm not seeking approval when I sing.  I'm seeking mental health and stress relief.  Getting pushy private messages from some guy wondering why I haven't dropped everything to respond to his PM is kind of creepy and rude.  It makes me think he's not a very nice person.

Anyway... I can't say I am inclined to join this guy in any more duets.  I feel like that would only encourage this kind of behavior.  In fact, now I kind of feel like blocking him.  But I know some people would fault me for that, too.

Brief SingSnap gripe... or... unwanted mansplainers

Apologies in advance for this post.  It's basically a petty gripe that I feel compelled to share.  Since most people who read this blog are interested in reading about Mindi Carpenter or her dear Aunt Karen, I figure it's somewhat safe to air my grievance here.

Yesterday, I was messing around on SingSnap and I decided to record an acoustic version of Stephen Bishop's "Separate Lives", a song I recently uploaded to the "community songbook".  The community songbook, for your information, is a somewhat new feature on SingSnap that allows users to upload karaoke songs to the catalog, which other users are then free to record or listen to. 

"Separate Lives", as many people know, was a huge hit in 1985 when it was featured in the movie, White Nights.  The version that appeared in the film was a duet done by Phil Collins and Marilyn Martin.  What many people may not know is that the song was actually written by singer-songwriter Stephen Bishop, who has made a successful career out of writing songs used in films.

Anyway, I found my karaoke version of Bishop's version of "Separate Lives" several years ago.  I decided to add it to the songbook.  Every once in awhile it gets featured.  Sometimes I record it, as I did yesterday.

Last night, as I was about to go to sleep, I got a comment from some guy...

Uh... thanks.

No, really.  Thanks for listening.  However, I wonder why this guy felt the need to tell me that this was originally a Phil Collins song, especially since he's wrong.  While Bishop's version may not have been released on an album until well after 1985, the fact is, he is the original performer because he wrote the song.  Phil Collins and Marilyn Martin recorded it and made it a huge hit; but it's Bishop's composition.  And I figure Bishop must have sung it a few times before Collins and Martin took their crack at it.

So my response was this.

I know this sounds really anal retentive, but if you're going to leave me music trivia on my recordings, at least be right.  

Stephen Bishop sings "Separate Lives".

The famous cover by Phil Collins and Marilyn Martin.

I will admit that I don't like it when people try to school me about things I already know.  I don't know where this hypersensitivity comes from.  Maybe it's because I'm the youngest by many years in my family and people never take me seriously.  Or maybe it's because I'm sick of mansplainers.  Granted, this is a pretty minor thing to be mansplaining, but it's still annoying when some random guy pops by and tries to tell me my business.  

I almost wonder if this man thinks I'm younger than I am.  Does he not realize that 1985 was smack dab in the middle of my adolescence?  Of course I've heard this song, especially when it was popular, played dozens of times on the radio.  I've also seen the movie it comes from many times.  But the fact remains that just because a song was made famous by a singer, that doesn't mean he or she was the original artist.  

An excellent example of this phenomenon is the song "(You Make Me Feel Like) A Natural Woman". That song was written by Carole King, Gerry Goffin, and Jerry Wexler.  However, it was Aretha Franklin who made it into a big hit.  Many people think it's her song, but really, it's more Carole King's song.  She wrote it and released her own version of it on 1971's Tapestry.  Frankly, I'd rather listen to Carole than Aretha because I like to hear songwriters sing their own songs.

Another example is the song "I Will Always Love You", which was made into a huge hit by Whitney Houston.  It was written by Dolly Parton, who also had a hit with it.  It was also covered by other singers, notably Linda Ronstadt, before Whitney sang it.  In fact, it was Ronstadt's version that captivated Kevin Costner enough to suggest it for the soundtrack for The Bodyguard.  Houston's version was epic, but it's not actually her song.  It's Dolly's song.

And finally, here's a lesser known example of this phenomenon.  Back in 2007, I was a fan of the TV show Army Wives.  Bill gave the DVD set of the first season for Christmas.  I decided to watch an episode that included commentary by a couple of the actors on the show.  Part of the soundtrack for the episode I watched included the song "Wounded Heart".  "Wounded Heart" was a song recorded by Bonnie Raitt for her album Silver Lining.  It was Raitt's version that was used on the show and one of the actor's referred to it as Raitt's song.  However, that song was written by Jude Johnstone.  I happen to own the album Johnstone did that includes it and her version was the first I ever heard.  So I immediately knew the actor had erred in calling "Wounded Heart" Bonnie Raitt's song, although I think Bonnie did a great job with it.

Jude Johnstone's "Wounded Heart".

Bonnie Raitt's cover.

I'm sure some will point out to me that I should be glad anyone listens to my recordings, let alone comments on them.  However, most people don't understand that I don't make recordings for the comments.  I do them because music is in my blood and I have no other musical outlets.  Sometimes comments are annoying, though.  I should probably turn them off, but that may make me seem bitchier than I actually am.  Most people are nice, anyway...  even the ones who rubber stamp comments on recordings I know they didn't actually listen to.  Maybe this gripe is just a product of my artistic temperament.    

Extra credit for the curious.  It's a little low for me, but I like this key.

Uploading like a fiend...

I see it's been awhile since my last post.  I've been pretty busy with stuff other than musical crap from the past.  Lately, I've been adding a lot of songs to SingSnap's community songbook.  I probably shouldn't be doing that, but I like having decent stuff to sing when the mood strikes.  

I was actually only planning to add a few songs, but unfortunately, I kind of got carried away.  The other day, I got a notification that I'd uploaded fifty songs.  I need to stop doing that and enjoy more of the ones uploaded by other people.

I haven't run across any old songs on SongPop that inspire me to post... so I'm sorry it's been awhile since I last wrote anything of substance on this blog.  Most people come here to read about The Carpenters, though, so I guess it's no big deal.

Maybe I'll be back later this month with some new stuff.

Unwanted duet partners...

At the risk of sounding like a primadonna bitch, I'm going to rant one more time about duets on SingSnap...  This time, it's about people who turn solo songs into duets and then expect me to be excited about their efforts.

Look, I'm going to be very honest.  I know what I'm about to write is going to sound petty and mean, but it's how I actually feel.  And while I do always value being kind, I also think that sometimes people need to know the truth.  Music is very important to me.  I know SingSnap is a karaoke site, but it's my one musical outlet.  To me, this stuff matters a lot more than it really should.

So here goes.  I don't like it when people turn my solos into duets.  No, scratch that.  I don't like it when they turn my solos into duets without asking me first.  Now, you may think this is because I'm "full of myself". Maybe, to some extent, that's true.  I would argue that if I were really full of myself and a snob about singing with people, I would never post open duets.  I have had many people join me on open duets.  Some are very good singers.  Some don't come within a mile of the proper pitch.  But if I post an open duet, I'm okay with all comers, regardless of their ability... as long as they don't play an instrument over my vocals.  ;-)

I don't feel the same way about solo songs.

Here's the thing.  A song recorded as a solo was intended to be a solo.  A duet typically has parts open for one singer to do their thing and other parts where they harmonize or otherwise collaborate.  Solo songs don't.  

Moreover, a lot of times, the songs people want to duet on are not really suitable as duets.  This morning, someone decided to duet with me on two Alison Krauss songs, neither of which were really intended to be collaborative efforts.  One song the guy did was "Baby Mine", which is a sweet lullaby a mother sings to her child.  The other was "A Living Prayer"... again, an intimate song for one person.  It's not a duet.  Or, at least I don't think it is.  

This guy left me comments with links to the duets.  I inwardly groaned.  Nine times out of ten, people who turn solos into duets can't actually sing.  I was just going to ignore the comments, but then decided to go listen.  In this case, it wasn't a bad thing that I listened.  To my surprise, the guy was a good singer.  He actually knew how to harmonize, which is a very welcome and apparently rare ability.

However, I was still irritated that he hijacked my solos and apparently expected me to be excited about what he did.  Actually... I think the expectation that I'm going to be excited is probably the biggest reason why this practice annoys me.  Because I really don't like being fake, but I also don't enjoy making other people feel bad.  There is a part of me that is a little blunt and, frankly, too honest.  I am this way especially when it comes to music.  I was the kid who used to put her fingers in her ears when her dad sang solos in the church choir.  I own it.  

On SingSnap, if you aren't unfailingly sweet, fawning, and polite, people relegate you into the total bitch pile.  So I feel compelled to be complimentary and nice even when people do things that annoy me and even if I think something sucks or am actually offended by it.  If I don't, I get accused of having a big head, being a diva, being full of myself, or not appreciating other people's talents (or lack thereof).

What I'd like to say to the people who duet on my solos is, "I'm flattered that you enjoyed my singing and decided to join me.  I wish you had sent me a message beforehand.  I would have liked to have worked with you to make this an actual duet.  Unfortunately, this song was not intended to be a duet.  Maybe we could have made it a duet.  Or we could have chosen a duet to do together.  I would have been happy to make an actual collaboration.  I hope if there is a next time you want to sing with me on a solo, you'll consider sending me a note first."

Unfortunately, I know that if I write a comment like this, the person will most likely take it as a total dis and word will get out that I'm a bitch.  I'm not really a bitch.  I just don't like it when people do this kind of stuff and I am expected to love it.  99% of the time, I don't love it... although I will admit there have been a couple of rare exceptions to that rule.  

Now... SingSnap does have a function that allows people to turn off the ability to duet with others.  Unfortunately, that function turns off duets for all future songs.  So, if I did want to post an open duet and forgot I'd hit the "no duets" switch, then I would get no takers on the songs I actually want people to duet on.  Moreover, if you turn off the ability to do duets, many people will still think you're "antisocial" or "big-headed".   Because apparently, some of them think they should have the right to improve on your efforts, as it were.  Frankly, I would rather the person not send me a link when they duet on one of my solos.  If you feel compelled to join me, be my guest.  But please don't expect me to like it.  If I want to listen to it, I'll find it on my page and go there on my own accord.  If it's good, I'll say so.

I'm sure there will come a day when I can no longer make recordings that I can stand to listen to.  My voice will probably change before too much longer.  I'm getting older.  For now... I suppose I just have to remember that some people have war in their country.  Ah... it's Monday and I've already spilled coffee.  I guess the tone has already been set for the rest of the day.

More SingSnap drama...

I'm sorry to say it, but I think I may be outgrowing SingSnap.com.  I was one of the first members in 2006, but I quit for a few years.  I got back on the site in 2012 due to a reader who wanted to hear my vocals.  I have enjoyed the site for the past few years, but some of the people there are seriously immature and stupid.

Case in point.  Back in October 2015, I wrote a rant about SingSnap on this very blog.  When I wrote that rant, I knew it made me sound shitty.  So I didn't share it on the site itself, because I knew I would get nasty comments if I did.

Well, this morning, I listened to a duet recording someone did with me.  It happened to be one of the same people I ranted about in 2015.  Once again, he criticized me for being "camera shy".  Then, on the duet in question, the guy played his harmonica very badly... so badly that my parts couldn't be heard.  And I sat there flabbergasted because I wondered why he bothered singing with me.

I wrote a complaint on SingSnap's discussion boards.  Maybe my complaint came off as petty or rude, but I was actually a bit offended.  Here I was, offering a duet for someone to join in on.  On my parts, he played his harmonica... badly.  He didn't play his harmonica when it was his turn to sing.  And I wondered what the hell he was joining me for.  I mean, if you think your harmonica playing is that awesome, why do I need to sing?

So I posed the question in the forum and some stupid bitch accused me of being "full of myself" and "lacking character".  Wow.  She said I should be "grateful" anyone sang with me.  And then she chastised me because I didn't comment on every duet on my page.

Well... first off, yesterday was the first time I recorded anything in two weeks because I have had the flu. I have been sick and have neither sung nor listened to anyone sing because I was sick.  But generally speaking, I do leave comments for most people who sing with me.  I don't care if they suck, either.  People like positive comments and I do usually leave them.  But really, why is it okay for them to be offended if I don't leave a nice comment (that I may or may not mean), but it's not okay to be offended if someone drowns me out on a duet?

I am legitimately a very good singer.  I know this for a fact.  I have been told this by real musicians... people who are legit professionals.  I have made money as a singer.  I don't need someone to tell me I'm good because I know I am.  And I don't think I'm being arrogant to make that comment.  I studied voice for years and have had enough people validate me that I don't need to hear it from everyone.  My ego is not that fragile.  I make recordings because it's therapeutic for me and a lot of them never get any views or comments.  I don't really care.

However, when I open a duet, it seems to me that it should be a collaborative effort.  If my partner is playing a musical instrument over my vocals, how is that a collaboration?  Is it any different than being in a play with someone and having them drown out my lines somehow?  And I am supposed to be grateful that they joined me for this?  No thanks.  I find it extremely rude.

If you do a legitimate duet with me, I will appreciate your efforts, as long as they are collaborative.  Playing a fucking harmonica over my vocals is not a collaborative thing to do.  It's rude and inconsiderate, especially if the general expectation is that I will go, listen, and leave you thanks or a positive comment for joining me.  I don't actually want to encourage people who aren't generous enough to give a duet partner their due.  I don't sing over other people on open duets.  I don't play a drum or a piano while they sing.  I have enough respect for them to let them do their thing without interference.  All I am asking for is the same consideration.

Sigh... I could probably write more, but it's getting late and no one reads this blog anyway, except to read about Mindi Carpenter.

I don't care about SongPop...

I know I've written about SongPop a few times on this blog and my main one.  It's actually become a source of intense irritation for me lately.  I have several games going with strangers.

For those who don't know what SongPop is...

Naturally, most of the people I play with are people whose musical tastes don't exactly match mine.  I should probably quit playing, except sometimes I hear a song I haven't heard in 30 plus years and I get all excited.  Also, sometimes it is fun to play... although a lot of times, it's just annoying.

I wish I could think of something else to write this morning, but I can't.  My mind is too blown by the craziness of the world today and worries about the future.  I have been doing some singing on SingSnap, which I think is somewhat good for my mood.  But I worry about that too, since I uploaded songs to the new community songbook... I probably shouldn't have done that, but felt compelled to.

Anxiety is fun, isn't it?  So is mindlessly blogging when you don't have a specific topic to write about.  I fear this blog may have reached the end of its usefulness.

Drowning my sorrows in music...

I think that's what I'm going to do today.  I think, once the sun comes up, I will play music and sing it and try very hard not to think about politics.  That's all...

Those of you who are here due to SingSnap may find multiple recordings from yours truly today.

SingSnap's community songbook...

SingSnap rolled out a new feature last week.  It's the "community songbook", which allows users to upload their own karaoke tracks to the site for all to enjoy.  It's a pretty cool feature, though personally I'm a little afraid to use it much.  I fear that copyright owners will come a calling.

I did upload one song, though, simply because it's so pretty I wanted to share it with a broad audience.  Six people have viewed it since I recorded it the other day.

I like having lots of songs to sing, but the threat of legal retaliation is real...  Especially from people like Don Henley, who is notoriously down on karaoke.  I love Don Henley's music, but I think he's an asshole who is not very generous with his gifts.  Music is meant to be shared.  I have bought a lot of his music over the years, too.  I guess he has the right to be the way he is, but it does make him look like a very selfish person.

Anyway, I may or may not mess around with it some more today.  I'm finding myself with little to do as we await Christmas.  I don't like to record when Bill is home, so I seldom do.  Maybe today I'll do a little music.  Or maybe I'll watch old episodes of Fame on iTunes.  It's a toss up.

I have no manners...

I stumbled across a funny discussion on SingSnap this morning.  Someone was gently sounding off because she had joined people on their open duets and they had not commented or thanked her for joining them.  The thread is actually a couple of months old but it's still getting comments.  I generally don't participate in SingSnap discussions.  I kind of try to keep a low profile there because I mainly use the site to practice music.  I do sometimes post open duets and sometimes I get good participation.  Sometimes no one joins me.  It's okay either way, as far as I'm concerned.

Generally speaking, when someone sings with me there, I do leave a comment thanking them for joining me.  Sometimes, if the person does a really good job, I'll say even more.  Sometimes people who sing with me have very little musical talent and it's actually kind of painful to listen, but I appreciate that they liked my duet enough to join me.  So I usually say "thanks" and leave it at that.

However, there are times when I don't comment.  Sometimes, people on SingSnap can engage in annoying behavior.  I don't want to encourage them to engage me, so I may not say anything about a duet they've done with me.  Last fall, I posted on this blog about my SingSnap pet peeves.  It actually felt good to write that piece because I really do try to be nice 90% of the time.  Even when I'm not nice to someone who has annoyed me somehow, I usually feel kind of guilty about it.  And believe me, there are more than a few people on SingSnap who can be very annoying and childish.

Anyway, one poster pretty much summed up how I feel about comments on SingSnap.  I kind of "know" this person because I once sang in an online trio with her.  She has a very good voice and no doubt gets a lot of people duetting with her.  She basically said that people shouldn't get all bunged up about who thanks them for joining them in duets.  She said that people have lives.  Sometimes people die.  Sometimes people are sick or tired or otherwise unwilling or unable to comment.  Sometimes people don't want to respond to someone because they're being annoying or engaging in harassment.  Her advice to the people who were upset about not being thanked was to just get over it and not let other people steal their joy.  Most of the time, the lack of a comment is not at all personal.

I noticed that no one had this lady's back, so I commented that I agreed with her that people should just enjoy SingSnap and not take offense where no offense was intended.  Yes, it takes just a minute to type "thank you" as a comment to someone.  But when someone has done a dozen duets with you in one day, that kind of thing can get old really fast.  Because people usually expect you to listen to the duet, too.  Given that songs can run several minutes and some people are, quite honestly, unpleasant to listen to, that can be a very painful exercise.

I am in the camp that prefers a sincere comment to one made strictly out of a sense of duty.  I figure anyone can type "thank you"; but if that's all you have to say, why bother?  Especially if you aren't actually thankful?  Aside from that, while I may be guilty of getting my panties in a twist about a lot of things, I sing on SingSnap strictly for fun.  I don't have the energy to waste worrying about who thinks I'm a good singer.  I don't have the time to worry about who thanks me for singing with them.  I sing there because it's good for my mental health and promotes creativity.  It's something I do for myself.  Singing on SingSnap is a mostly solitary activity anyway.  

I used to get notifications every time someone liked my song, commented, duetted with me, or sent me private messages.  After awhile, the notifications got to be very excessive, so I turned off most of them.  I even turned off the messages I'd get when someone duetted with me because sometimes there would be a lot of them to wade through.  I'd get the email from SingSnap, plus a comment and/or a private message.  That would end up being three emails for one recording.  It got pretty annoying after awhile.

Now, I check my "featured on" page every day.  Most of the time, if someone sings with me, I will listen and comment.  Sometimes, I don't, though.  I think that should be okay.  People shouldn't feel entitled to a virtual pat on the back.  And if someone gives you one, it shouldn't be because they feel obligated to.  I value a sincere, genuine, expression of gratitude and friendship over a fake one.  A fake "thank you" means nothing to me.  

So the lady who had been arguing with my trio friend basically said that people who don't comment are "rude" and have no manners.  I guess that's me.  I wrote that she and I have a different opinion about what rude and disrespectful behavior is.  But that's okay, since the world would be a very boring place if everyone agreed.

Her response?  "No, it wouldn't LOL."

How rude.

A new duet partner...

I don't have much to say today, but thought I would share these two duets done by a guy who found my open recordings...  He gave me goosebumps and needs more exposure!





It's always a pleasure when I get to duet with someone who can sing well!  I hope we'll get to do more together.

SingSnap pet peeves...

I know I've got some people from SingSnap reading this blog, which is why I'm addressing this subject of SingSnap pet peeves.  Generally speaking, I really enjoy SingSnap and the people who are on the site.  It gives me a fun outlet for my musical leanings, a place to experiment and collaborate.  I've even had the chance to meet a fellow Snapper since I moved to Germany.  However, I would be lying if I said I never get annoyed with some of the behavior on that site.  So, without further ado, here are my top ten SingSnap pet peeves.

1.  People who constantly bug me to duet with them or leave me "song assignments".  I am very flattered when people like what I do.  I like doing duets.  But I don't like it when I get constant PMs from the same people inviting me to duet with them.  A lot of times, I'm not interested in doing the songs they want me to do.  Or I don't know the song and don't have the time or desire to learn it.  Or, being very honest here, they can't sing at all and it's painful for me to listen to them.  Sorry, I know that sounds shitty and elitist.  It's the truth, though.  I have a very hard time listening to people who can't sing-- like, it's physically uncomfortable for me.  It's a lot easier to deal with extremely off key singing if I'm in a bar with friends and beer.  At home on my computer, it's tough.  There are exceptions to this rule.  I have a few friends I regularly duet with and it doesn't bother me when they invite me to sing with them.  They're my friends and I know we can work together and have similar tastes.  But if you keep sending requests and I ignore them, please take the hint.  Don't force me to be assertive and tell you to knock it off or put you on my block list.  I don't like hurting people's feelings.

2.  People who duet with me, but sing or play an instrument during my part.  Yesterday, some guy joined me in a duet.  First off, he criticized me because I don't usually do videos (and that's another pet peeve I will address)-- he called me "camera shy".  Then, during the parts of the song where I sang, he played his harmonica.  Now... I get that you play harmonica and that's cool and all, but how would you like it if I did something similar to you during your part?  How about if I harmonized loudly with you during your solos so that your voice is drowned out?  Don't like it?  Don't blame you.  It's the same thing when you play your harmonica or another instrument during my parts.  It's rude and doesn't make me want to sing with you.  And, sorry to say, but I sing better than you play harmonica anyway-- at least in that particular case.

3.  People who call me "hon" or "sweetie".   It's a pet peeve of mine online and offline.  I hate it when people I don't know call me cutesy names, especially since I'm usually older than they are.  My name is on my profile.  Call me Jenny.  Call me knotty if you want to (lots of people on the 'net do).  Don't call me hon, honey, sweetie, or darlin' (only my husband is allowed to call me that).  And please don't call me Jen or Jennifer.  It's Jenny.  

4.  People who leave me a generic comment with a link to their recordings.  Especially if I don't know them.   Look, I know everyone loves comments.  But if you pimp your recordings on my recordings, I can promise you I won't be listening to them.  I think it's rude.  I might make an exception for people I "know", but if we've never interacted, I don't appreciate song pimping on my recordings.  It's akin to spamming.  It's doubly annoying when you leave a link and call me "sweetie", too.  In that case, I might add you to my block list.  ;-) I don't care if you sing like Aretha Franklin or James Taylor.

5.  People who tell me to change my nickname.  Do you like it when someone criticizes your name?  How about if they tell you to change it?  That happened to me the other day.  Some guy left me a comment and said I didn't look like a "knothead" so I should change my name.  I understand that many people think the term "knothead" is derogatory; however, it is my internet handle and has been for many years.  My dad used to call me a knothead  when I was a kid.  I have since claimed it as my Internet nickname.  I am comfortable with it.  It's not obscene and I'm not offended by it.  Neither should you be, although I'm glad you don't think I'm really a knothead.      

6.  People who tell me to make videos.  You will rarely find me making videos on SingSnap.  I don't feel comfortable on camera.  I don't want to feel like I have to put on makeup before I do my karaoke.  Sometimes I sing when I'm drunk and no one wants to see that on video.  I don't care if you think that makes me "camera shy".  I don't want to do it.  So don't tell me to turn on my camera.  If I want to turn it on, I'll turn it on.  I don't need to be ordered to do it.  Ditto when you give me instructions on how to use my mic.  If I want instruction, I'll ask for it.

7.  People who flirt with me or make sexual comments.  It's nice to know that some people think I'm "cute", even at the ripe old age of 43.  I get more flirty comments now than I ever did 20 years ago, when I was still single and looking.  But I am now happily married and very devoted to my husband and I don't like to be flirted with, unless of course, we "know" each other.  Even then, it's not really cool.

8.  People who PM me after they duet with me.  There was a time when sending a PM after a duet was protocol because SingSnap didn't automatically let you know when something happens on the site the way it does now.  However, the system is now such that I get an email when someone joins me in a duet, loves, or comments on my posts; therefore, it's not necessary to send a PM with a link.  It just clutters up my inbox and distracts me.  If you duet with me, I will find out about it, because even if I don't get a notice from SingSnap, I regularly check the "featured on" link on my profile.  And I do usually listen and leave a comment.

9.  People who can't harmonize and still think they're the shit.  I'm sorry.  This sounds shitty and elitist, I know.  But it's very frustrating when someone sings "How's The World Treating You" with me, bugs me to listen to it, and then it turns out they're just singing in unison with me.  James Taylor's part is a harmony part.  If you can't sing harmony, you can send me a note and I'll do his part and you can do Alison's melody part.  If you can't harmonize, there's no point really in duetting, especially on that song.  You might as well sing it by yourself.  I know it sounds elitist... sorry.

10. People who turn my solo recordings into duets.  And then send me links to listen to whatever they've done.  Again, I know it sounds shitty, but I don't always want to hear someone try to improve on a song that is intended to be a solo.  I have started clicking the button that makes it impossible for people to duet on songs that I don't intend to be duets.  I hate doing it because I know some people think it's "antisocial", but I also hate getting multiple links to songs that aren't duets and were not set up to be duets.  Especially since it's very rare that the duet version is better than the solo version.  If you think this sounds snotty, allow me to offer a scenario that might explain why I don't like this practice.  Imagine you're on a stage performing a song and pouring yourself into it.  Halfway through your song, someone uninvited from the audience jumps up and starts singing with you...  off key or off rhythm or they just don't have the same "sense" for the sound that you have.  How do you think that would make you feel?  I'm flattered that some of you want to join me, but I'd appreciate it if you'd send me a note asking me first.  That way, we can set it up so it's really a duet and not someone horning in on another person's song.  But please don't repeatedly pester me about it, either. 

Listen, folks, I know this list makes me sound horrible.  I truly don't mean to be.  I enjoy SingSnap and the vast majority of people on there are super nice and fun to interact with.  There are some great singers on SingSnap that I enjoy listening to and collaborating with.  But there are also some common practices that really annoy me, and I don't always feel like I can voice them on the messageboards without people getting offended.   I know it's just karaoke, but to me, the struggle is real.

Maybe my SingSnap pet peeves don't matter to the average person, but hell... it's my blog and I needed something to write about.  So I've had my say and I feel better now.

Nobody Loves You When You're Down and Out...

I think I need to sing the blues more often.  This was fun!

Blue Kentucky Girl...

I just found this classic song by Emmylou Harris and I think I've fallen in love with it.

This is Emmylou's version from 1979...

But, it was actually recorded in 1965 by none other than Loretta Lynn.

Makes sense, since she's from Kentucky...

I decided to give this song a whirl yesterday.  The recording below is only my second time singing it, but I am sure there will be more.  It's a good song for me, even though I am a Virginian.

I need to learn more Emmylou Harris songs.  Maybe more Loretta Lynn, too...

Trio!

Just dropping by to show off the trio I got to be in on SingSnap.com.  I think this turned out pretty damn great!

I do the first part and the melody on the choruses, except in the third verse when I switch to high harmony and the second verse, when I sing low harmony...

This was a bit of a pain to make, but it evolved into something beautiful, especially since I don't even know the other two women I'm singing with.

SingSnap rocks!

You Don't Have To Be A Star, Baby...

Gotta love this hit from 1977...

"You Don't Have To Be A Star"...

Marilyn McCoo and Billy Davis Jr. sang this duet back in the days when disco was king.  I remember the song, but was actually more familiar with Marilyn McCoo because she was the hostess of Solid Gold back in the 80s.  I used to watch her all the time.

Here's Marilyn singing on Solid Gold... Andy Gibb is introducing her.

And here, Marilyn and Andy sing his hit "I Just Want To Be Your Everything".

I was never a big fan of Marilyn McCoo's, but I did have some fun singing her old duet today.  Check out the vocals on OBSEQUIOUS.

I think this turned out rather well.

Marilyn seems to do well when she duets... Here she is with Ricky Nelson on Solid Gold.

Of course, most people on Solid Gold were lip synching, with the exception of Stevie Nicks, who was apparently bombed out of her gourd when she performed.

Marilyn McCoo introduces Stevie... and comes off rather Star Search TV spokesmodel-esque...

My most recent SingSnap duets...

This guy on SingSnap joined me on a couple of duets…



"How Do You Keep The Music Playing"



"Yes I'm Ready"

I have to admit, I actually laughed when I listened to these songs because the guy singing with me sounds like a combination of Michael Bolton and Michael McDonald.  He has a very unusual voice.  And I had to post these duets here because they are very different…  I definitely enjoyed listening.

I like the original versions too, though…  

Suddenly...

Back in 1980, the colossal bomb Xanadu was hitting the theaters.  I loved that film because it was bright, colorful, and had music by Olivia Newton John, Cliff Richard, and the Electric Light Orchestra. I was quite the ONJ fan when I was a kid, but I also had a vivid imagination and that movie really captured it for some reason.  I loved the costumes and dancers and most of all, the music.  The acting sucked balls.

Anyway, I like to sings ONJ songs sometimes and happened to find an open duet with a guy named Venomspyda, who did a bang up job on "Leather & Lace" with me a few months ago.  I decided to join him once again.



It turned out relatively okay.  I'm hoping Santa brings me a mixer so I can fix my audio.

Mockingbird...

This song has been popularized by plenty of folks.  Perhaps James Taylor and Carly Simon's version is the most famous… it's definitely the one with which I am most familiar.  I bought a Carly Simon greatest hits album about twenty years ago and her famous duet with JT was on it.  I liked it, even though it's kind of corny…

Inez and Charlie Fox had the original version of this song…

Toby Keith sang it with his daughter...

And of course, Clark and Ellen Griswold sang it while on Vacation...

I did my part some time ago and this talented gentleman joined me.  I think it turned out quite well.

With you, I'm born again...

The guy singing with me on this song has a gorgeous voice.  I found him last night by chance and recorded another with him...



Actually, I found "Cruisin'" first, then decided on the above encore, which I think went better because I am a lot more familiar with that song.

I love it when I find people who can sing.  Making music online is turning out to be a very rewarding way to pass time.  Yesterday, I discovered that a few of my YouTube videos have started to pick up earnings.  Really, they have earned 11 cents, but that's 11 cents I didn't have before and never expected to make.  And after awhile, as I have found with Epinions, those pennies can add up.  My first month on Epinions, I made 19 cents.  10 years later, that 19 cents has amassed to over $11,000.  I know I spent as much or more buying the products to review to make that cash, but it's still money I wouldn't have had if I hadn't bothered to write.  And I would have bought the stuff anyway.

So... on that note, here's yesterday's video.



This video is different, because it's actual video and not just photos.  I left the soundtrack in and added a vocal track.  My singing voice is probably nicer than my speaking voice, especially since I usually say gross things when I'm speaking.  Somehow this song matched the action pretty well... It made Bill tear up, but then MacGregor was his dog, really...  I miss him.  It's good to hear his houndy bark again.

Beauty and the Beast...

I will admit that I am not a Celine Dion fan.  She has a wonderful voice, but I don't typically like her music that much.  It's more the style than the substance that turns me off.  However, I did like "Beauty and the Beast", the theme she sang with Peabo Bryson in the early 1990s.

I don't listen to this much anymore, though...

A few days ago, SingSnap had "Beauty and the Beast" on the featured songs list.  I decided to try it, not knowing it that well.  I posted the female part and forgot about it until this morning, when a Swiss guy named Boerni sang with me and sent me a private message.



I have to say, I got goosebumps when he started singing.  He's really good.

Sure gets the holiday weekend off to a nice start!